August 14, 2013:
Well, Things are looking up.....because God has been invited in to help! She told me that she was praying for God direction in what she was doing. I have been begging for that for months. Now that she has asked God in he WILL come in. If you don't ask he wont intrude.
I am starting to see that this was all part of Gods plan anyway.
She prayed and prayed and prayed and prayed that God make me a better father, husband and man.
She just never realized that steps he HAD to take to get me to the place she asked him to take me.
He HAD to break me completely of my selfish will and habits.
He HAD to make me search my heart & soul for an anchor to hold onto.
He HAD to break my heart for her so that he could clean out the goo and put in the new.
He HAD to break my heart for my kids so that I would appreciate that time I had with them.
He HAD to break my will and give it all to him so HE could make things perfect for us.
He HAD to tear me down to my core so that he could build me back up better than I ever was.
Now I KNOW what is important in a family.
Now I KNOW what is important in life.
Now I see that if God had not stepped in and broke my heart, will and spirit I would have gone on and ruined her completely.
BUT it is finished!
She is starting to trust me again.
She is starting to like me again.
She is holding my hand again.
She is hugging me again.
She is asking ME out to dinner alone with her whenever she gets the chance.
She is starting to love me better than a Friend again.
She is starting to believe that God IS working with and in us on this.
Now it is a matter of time, now its up to ME!
Can I STAY the man that God has created in me?
Can I STAY the man she needs me to be?
God has set ALL this up for me to win or lose! My choices are what will give God the power or take it away. If I remain strong and follow his word we will win. If I lose patience and try and take control from God it will slow way down OR fail completely.
So there it is....God IS working hard on it.
God IS hearing our prayers.
God WANTS this family intact.
Marriage is the union of 2 people in Gods name...thus the highest point of perfection people can strive for...and since Gods will is perfect, keeping this union together brings him glory and honor!
Divorce is the breaking of the union of 2 people that joined together in Gods name...thus it is lowest point of in-perfection that joined people can achieve....and since God is not a God of failure, divorce is NEVER HIS perfect will. He will ALLOW it BUT it is NOT his will for married people.
Divorce is the LAST thing he wants for a marriage. It is the outward sign that some one inside the marriage has not given them self completely to his will.
A marriage restored is the outward sign that every one inside the marriage has given themselves over to his will. And his will is perfect. He WANTS marriages to thrive. But they MUST thrive under his will or they will have trouble and anger and pain.
Now this is all based on the people in the married being believers in Jesus Christ. Those not given over to Christ can expect that Gods laws of human behavior AND the prayers of those believers that they know will be what works behind the scenes for them.
So there it is. GOD WILL save this marriage. He still might have us separate for a time BUT he is going to open the heart of my wife and take the bitterness and anger and pain for me out and put in the love that he has for me and her in its place. Once that is done she will open up like a beautiful flower to God and myself. Love WILL fill our home.
Respect WILL guide our words.
Honor WILL lead our hands.
God WILL reign inside our lives!
God has this thru Jesus Christ and Gods will is PERFECT!
And marriage is PERFECT and God only does whats PERFECT when he is given free will to work inside it.
GOD WILL restore my family to me THRU my beloved wife.
GOD WILL restore her love for me THRU Jesus Christ.
GOD WILL restore my faith in him THRU the events he has set for my life before I was born.
GOD WILL restore her faith in him in the same way.
GOD'S WILL IS PERFECT!!
Jesus loved her enough to die for her and take the punishment for her sins.
I HAVE no choice but to love her as Jesus loved her.....completely, freely, honestly, un-conditionally.
She is my wife forever and I will wait till God returns her to me perfectly.
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